I have comprised the following list of rules that seem to standard in most animes I have watched. Not really, I stole it from uncyclopedia....
1. The more retarded a plan is, the more likely it is to work. (ex. Naruto)
2. In cooperation with the first law, the main enemy always has a genius plan that fails.
3. When a character gains the possession of a giant robot, they immediately know how to control it without prior training. (ex. Evangelion)
4. The longer the series continues, the stronger the enemies get exponentially. (ex. Dragonball Z)
5. The main character is always small and wimpy-looking, only to hold a tremendous secret power usually explained to him by a wise old person.
6. The quicker someone dies off, the more likely they are not really dead. (ex. Bleach)
7. Getting stabbed multiple times only kills you if you are unimportant. Remember that, Kazuya.
8. Additionally, any unimportant character NEVER gets into fights. If they do, they are beaten easily.
9. When a character performs an attack, they MUST yell out it's name, therefore giving their opponent the obvious advantage of knowing what they're going to do, but never doing what they can do to prevent or counter it. If they don't yell out the name, it doesn't count because that's cheating.
10. The louder said character shouts the name of an attack, the more powerful that attack will be. (ex. Dragon Ball Z)
11. No matter how long the preparation to an attack, and no matter how many spangly things are created, the preparation cannot be interrupted before it is complete, the attack is permitted to miss however. (ex. Sailor Moon)
12. The magical tools necessary to kill someone are commonplace. (ex. Death Note)
13. Internal monologues and/or long emotional conversations may never be interrupted, even if they take place in the middle of world-saving battles.
14. When in doubt, scream loudly and sacrifice yourself to have no effect on the enemy.
15. The main character always has the power to save their respective world.
16. If the main character has something everyone else has, the main character's can do about 50 more things than everyone elses. Also, the secondary character's can do 20 more things. (ex. Digimon)
17. The bad guy always dismisses the main character(s) as a minor annoyance, but never suspect them to have superpowers and might even go so far as to pass up the opportunity to kill or maim him/her on several occasions.
18. There are samurais and ninjas. At least one. Or else.
19. There will always be a point at which the protagonist is shot down by a bullet, missile, or, in the case of the End of Evangelion, gigantic naked lady that wants to merge with the world. At this point, peaceful Latin music will play for many minutes as the protagonist (or his robot, in the case of Neon Genesis Evangelion and the Gundam series,) falls to the ground in slow motion.
20. If a character's hair is hiding some disfiguring mark, laser beam, etc, no amount of force will move that characters hair until permitted.
21. You may not start pwning the bad guy until the cool music starts (ex. Naruto)
22. The more an enemy brags about easily owning the hero, the easier that enemy will be defeated.
23. Before the final showdown between the main character and the main villain, they must each stare at each other for at least 30+ minutes and review how they got where they are and what they are about to do (in case you missed the entire season). Meanwhile, the other minor characters stand patiently off to the side usually commenting on the two important characters.
24. The main character must always have some outrageously powerful ability that no one else has, but must never be able to control it.
25. No matter what he's accused of doing or how mysterious his origins are, the hero will always be ready to fight to the death for any girl he met three seconds ago. (Ex. Fullmetal Alchemist)
Well, on the parts mentioned of Evangelion, I can tell you that they went through a bit of training on that, training that was actually showed. Shinji Ikari had quite a bit of instability in the Eva and he didn't really know what to do. But the thing that follows the anime cliche is that "WOW! He killed an angel and his synchro rate is off the charts!" after like, five minutes in the robot.
This is why I like Boogiepop, Serial Experiments Lain, Texhnolyze, and Ghost in the shell so much. Not One, no, not a single item on that list applies to these animes. You'd be quite surprised. Those anime were fresh, unique, original, and at times, weird. Because these settings, these anime, for once in the genre, things actually seemed real~ Like you could really feel the atmosphere! THAT is what makes good anime. Not this Naruto and DBZ crap.
I'm pretty well past my DBZ fandom, although I suffered a small relapse some time ago.
Well, I can certainly see a consistency between Avatar and item #19, only he was shot by lightning. Of course, Avatar probably isn't considered an anime, but...eh, what the heck? :P
I loled.
And a sense of humor is good for these types of things, JQ.
Ugh, man, that was funny! :D
The saddest thing is that its true!! :(
I also found a list of Physics pertaining to anime. I'll post it in a bit, I have to track it down again.
I'd LOVE to read it.
This one's a bit longer. Once again, taken from Uncyclopedia.org.
1. Acceleration is not equal to force over mass, but rather an independent variable sometimes called "whatever I feel like". This allows heroes with no real training to jump over buildings, accelerate to unhealthy speeds from a dead stop in a second, change the direction of their jumps (and start spinning) in midair, and many other feats that make the real world seem boring and pointless.
2. Also, gravity has little to no effect on people while they are performing said feats... Unless it suddenly does. Surprise!
3. The bad guy MUST have an unnatural hair color, preferably silver or white. (e.g. Sephiroth)
4. Character's hair and clothes are almost indestructible. The only exception is the shirt. After a long intense battle, the shirt must atleast be missing a sleave.(ex. Dragon Ball Z)
5. When a person jumps an innumerable amount of feet in the air, makes a killing blow, or both, they fall at 1/5 of regular speed while the rest of the world reacts normally.
6. In all no-way-out situations, 1 + 1 really does equal a window.
7. Even the most drastic and dire injuries can be cured by the next episode.
8. When injured, characters receive bandages instantly - even without going to the hospital or calling an ambulance.
9. The larger and tougher-looking someone is, the weaker they are, and vice-versa.
10. Concerning mechs, the larger and heavier a mech is, the faster and more agile it will be; This can however be incorrect if the larger heavier mech is piloted by the bad guy, in which case it will be clumsy.
11. Additionally, transformation (mecha, magical girl, monster, building, whatever) must be shown transforming in slow motion EVERY TIME they are shown, rather than only the first time.
12. People normally dress up in what people today would consider embarrassing (see cosplay).
13. Male (and sometimes female) characters have at least 13 gallons of blood. (ex. Bleach)
14. You do NOT write fanfics about MY SESSHY CHAN!
15. According to the Anime Face Expansion theory, which was turned into a law on the 17th of September, 2006, people in the world of anime can stretch their mouths past their faces, into a two-dimensional space that has no real existence.
16. The amount of energy exerted while jumping has absolutely nothing to do with how long one remains in the air, or for that matter, how many times you can kick someone before coming back down.
17. Time, along with inertia, is applied selectively. Seconds can easily become hours, especially if the hero(es) need a great amount of time to do something like stop a bomb, run out of a building, or read a book about butterflies, or have to figure something out during a combat.
18. Sometimes hair can naturally be outrageously spiky without the use of products. In some instances, it can even retain its shape instantly.
19. You will always become stronger and have extra stamina if you scream at the top of your lungs, e.g. Dragonball Z.
20. A character's eyes are the size of their mouth open, and five times larger than the nose.
21. Any substance or place containing the word "Tokyo" in it is 10 times more explosive than dynamite. Use of the Neo, Neu, or Mega prefixes increases this to 100 times. If a city has been christened Neumeganeotokyo, it will be the site of an inter dimensional rift that will summon Flying Spaghetti Monsters.
22. Whenever something witty or plain stupid is said, the heads of any intelligent being are jettisoned towards the ground. Their heads may also start sweating profusely.
23. Explosions or blasts have less graphic effects on people. Generally, whenever engulfed in a powerful blast, they either completely survive, covered in ash, or are disintegrated mid-beam.
24. If there were a gigantic monster or force taking over the world, there are two options for an army.
1. They don't exist.
2.Their most powerful forces don't have any effect on the enemy.
25. No matter what timeframe the show is set in -- past, present, or future -- the main hero and his antagonist will both use a sword for a weapon. These swords will be far more powerful than any gun and often capable of distance attacks.
26. A sword can cut through everything except other swords (including wooden swords). The only exception to this rule is if you don't have faith in your sword. (ex. Bleach)
27. And no matter how big that big sword is, no character will stand out in a crowd.
28. No matter how many times you use that sword to strike armored targets or fire that gun on full auto mode it will never break, jam or need any form of maintenance unless it is critical to the story that the weapon breaks, jams or needs maintenance.
29. Once engaged in a fight, all time around the fight halts.
30. When someone dies, it rains.
31. When everyone has gotten over the loss and remembered how wonderful the person was, the sun comes out.
32. Though some attacks are strong enough to destroy planets, when used against an enemy, the most that remains is a crater. With the characters watching from the sidelines unharmed.
33. Some animals take on intelligent properties usually attributed to humans.
34. Every character has one set of clothes.
35. Swords are the most powerful weapons. Guns, missiles, and bombs are ineffective. (ex. Somebody brings a gun to shoot the monster and the bullets bounce off, yet then the hero despite being armed with antique/obsolete medieval sword can slash the stuffing out of the monster)
36. Some objects on a person may have their own center of gravity. (Ex.: A sword can be attached to a person's side or back without a belt or a sheath to hold it in).
37. In the event of a card game, the hero can always spawn from nowhere cards that would be completely useless in any other situation, but are exactly what he needs now. (ex. Yu-Gi-Oh)
38. Anime characters are immune from such mundane hazards as intense heat, freezing cold, or poison gas... except when they're suddenly not. Surprise!
39. When the main character is forced to do some complex or dangerous task for the first time, even though he has never done it before he will still always be better than the oldest veteran.
40. An anime character can fall any distance onto anything without suffering anything worse than brief unconsciousness. In fact, falling a huge distance is an excellent cure for otherwise fatal wounds -- anyone who you see shot, stabbed, or mangled and then tossed off a cliff is guaranteed to return later in the game with barely a scratch.
41. The Moral Of The Story: Every problem in the universe can be solved by finding the right long-haired pretty boy and beating the crap out of him.
42. If you are doing something awesome random flashing streaking colors will soon past you in the background.
Despite some notable exceptions to these rules, the Laws of Anime Physics are, by and large, binding to the full gamut of Anime and Manga works.
Once again, I loled. Especially at #15. ;D
Of course, Yu-Gi-Oh has an excuse as to why #37 happens. :P
I'm dead, and my eyes are tearing up, and I have to go to a party! dammmit...
Hey, easy with the God.
Some of those rules are in the RPG cliches (http://project-apollo.net/text/rpg.html).
...I'd post them here, but there's what, 110? Yeah, I'd feel spammy.
Yeah, I noticed. That list took me like...a half hour to read.
Dude, both the laws and physics are very similar to what is in the mainstream anime. I wonder why I didn't notice them before...
That was sooo funny. And true. :P
To quote from someone I know in real life:
They must be magicians!