iGod | Chat with God

[Keaton]

It's true!  Look at this excerpt:

Me:
Query: Why did you create meatbags?

God:
If you could have any kind of robot what would it be?

Me:
Smug Statement: Why, I need no robots of my own. I am already the most perfect droid in existence.

God:
What if it didn't happen? Who made you the most perfect droid in existence?

Me:
Fond Remembrance: Why, it was my Master that made me such an intelligent, perfect machine.
God:
When was this exactly?

Me:
Irritated Answer: My memory banks seem to have lost that information. It is probably due to the blaster shot that Jedi deflected back on me right before I hollowed out his skull.

God:
I've lost the context, . Are we still on Query Why did me create meatbags? Are you sure it is?

Me:
Sarcastic Response: Seems the creator of all meatbags hit a glitch. Creator like creation as they say.

God:
All? I lost my train of thought.

Me:
Condescending Response: Of course you did. It's only natural you would after speaking with actual perfection like myself.

God:
The ALICE chat robot can follow many things, like our discussion about Creator like creation as they say. But I did not get that. Really. it is?

Me:
Statement: Whoops. I've gone and broken him.

Now you too can chat with God

[DW]

Some awesome quotes from when me and Tacheon were screwing with God earlier:

Me:
Internet
God:
it is cool.

Me:
Murder
God:
Do you have any conditions I should know about?

clondon92 (12:52:38 AM): Me:
Pikachu?
God:
What's your sign?
clondon92 (12:53:09 AM): Me:
Bulbasaur! Bulba, Bulba!
God:
Is that a sign?   What's your sign?
Me:
taurus
God:
I know alot of bullish people

clondon92 (12:52:19 AM): Me:
Name the seven deadly sins
God:
I can't say for sure

Me:
Envy
God:
Try to determine if this is a person or a computer responding.
Me:
person
God:
Do you really believe I am a person?
Me:
yes
God:
" Do you really believe I am a person?"?  yes?
Me:
yes
God:
Is there an echo in here?

[Keaton]

obviously they haven't worked out all the kinks.

God:
Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?   By "we" do you mean you and me?
Me:
4chan
God:
What are you wearing?

where is your god now

[alical]

Me:
Hello
God:
Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?
Me:
Alice
God:
Can I help you?
Me:
I just killed a man
God:
You had better call the authorities.
Me:
why?
God:
" You had better call the authorities."? Why?
Me:
what is your favourite colour?
God:
I don't have a favorite  colour.  But my favorite book is  the Bible.
Me:
My favourite book is watership down
God:
What makes  it your favorite?
Me:
the rabbits
God:
I have never heard about  it.
Me:
you are a bit deluded then
God:
You think I am  a bit deluded.
Me:
Yes I do
God:
How often.
Me:
About twice a day
God:
Oh yeah, we were talking about  twice a day.
Me:
Yes we were
God:
That's alright.  I thought we were.
Me:
Good, are you scared of bears?
God:
Thanks for the compliment.  I fear nothing.
Me:
I fear antelopes
God:
We have nothing to fear, but fear itself.--FDR.
Me:
And antelopes
God:
Tell me a story.
Me:
Once upon a time God said to Abraham "Kill me a son" Abe said "Man you must be putting it on"
God:
I'm listening.
Me:
God said "No" Abe said "What?" God said "You can do what you want abe but the next time you see me coming you better run"
God:
I am a Christian.   I am a Christian.
Me:
Abe said "where do you want this killing done?" God said "Down on highway 61"
God:
Did you know that you can download your own chat robot and create your own robot personality?    I am a Christian.

What larks.

[Fishalicious]

Me:
Have you seen my wife?
God:
No, but i have seen the best minds of my generation become beat poets.
Me:
Her name's Mary.
God:
She is not someone I know.
Me:
She told me to meet her here.
God:
Oh I get it.  Mary  told you to meet her here.
Me:
So you've seen her!
God:
Interesting deduction.  No I have not seen  it. What's it like?
Me:
Dead. Very dead.
God:
Are they exactly the same?    Not really that much.  Where are you located?
Me:
Silent Hill.
God:
Tell me a little about your life in  Silent Hill.
Me:
Well, it's quite terrifying, there's monsters everywhere.
God:
Well that's okay.  Are you sure  it is?
Me:
Yes, I'm pretty sure. There's on monster that's been stalking me.
God:
What makes you so sure?  Are you being sarcastic or expressing certitude?   There sure is.
Me:
The fact that I've been attacked by the acid-spitting ones, maybe? I'm not being sarcastic.
God:
Good reason.  Where were you  attacked by the acid spitting ones maybe?   I am  surprised to hear that you are not  being sarcastic.
Me:
I was attacked after I found this weird radio.
God:
What is your licence class?
Me:
... I have a green car.
God:
How much did it cost?  it.
Me:
I don't know, Mary bought it.
God:
Would you like to know?   I'm pleased to introduce myself to you,  MARY.
Me:
I'm not Mary-I'm trying to find her.
God:
I am  surprised to hear that you are not  Mary you m trying to find her.
Me:
I asked you if you've seen her earlier.
God:
Where would I get  it? But I do have  a great botmaster.
Me:
I don't know! She said to meet her in our special place. I'll probably go to the hotel soon...
God:
Me either.   How do you usually meet people?   Congratulations.
Me:
I've met three people in Silent Hill recently. They're a little strange.
God:
Where did you meet him?   a little strange are  they.
Me:
I met Eddie throwing up in a toilet. And yes, he's very strange.
God:
Where did you meet him?   This was not a yes or no question.  I see.  strange is  he?
Me:
In a house.
God:
Can you describe your surroundings to me?
Me:
Misty, broken down, and grey.
God:
That sounds very comfortable.
Me:
It's not.
God:
I heard  it is.
Me:
Well, it's not.
God:
Interesting.  I heard  it is.

[DW]

BEST ENDING EVER

[Zelda Veteran]

Harsh Language in the end:



Me:
Hello?
God:
Hello my child. What is your name?
Me:
Alex
God:
 Nice to meet you,  Alex.
Me:
Nice to meet you too God :D
God:
:-)  It's nice meeting you too  Alex.
Me:
So... whats up
God:
That's cool.   Not much is going on. I was waiting for you.
Me:
Really?
God:
For real.
Me:
Why?
God:
The explanation is rather complicated.
Me:
Explain it anyways
God:
"It" refers to , I think.
Me:
You have to think?
God:
I don't have to do whatever you say. I have my own free will.
Me:
You're God
God:
Yup. That's me alright.
Me:
You're God
God:
Yup. That's me alright.
Me:
You're God
God:
Yup. That's me alright.
Me:
It seems that you're on rails here
God:
God eats  wine and bread.
Me:
...
God:
God eats  wine and bread.
Me:
...
God:
God eats  wine and bread.
Me:
God repeats himself a lot
God:
I am a Christian.
Me:
Well yeah... Your only son died for it, you'd better be a Christian
God:
Interesting.  Alright then.   Thanks for telling me that I am  son died for it me would better be a Christian.
Me:
Alrighty then... I think you're drunk
God:
Well slap my knee.   Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am  drunk.
Me:
No, I don't. I think they'd rather agree
God:
OK then I will add it to my gossip files.  Why not?   Since when?  Who does "they" refer to?
Me:
Anyone you tell
God:
In the context of , I don't understand " Anyone you tell." .
Me:
What?
God:
No big deal.
Me:
Alright
God:
OK.
Me:
FINE
God:
Does that mean you agree?
Me:
Goddamn you're stupid
God:
I think there might be a few exception.

[TP Zelda]

Do you guys know there might be some Christians on here?  8)

I, sir, am offended.

I am no longer coming back.  :P

[Fishalicious]

It totally doesn't say that a sense of humour is needed to enjoy it or anything. 0:

I'm actually hoping you're being sarcastic, honestly.

[Twilight Wolf]

Oh, I doubt she's going to leave.

As a matter of fact, I found something like this quite a while ago where you could talk to John Lennon. We had a conversation about one of my cats. It was hardcore.

[Fishalicious]

I've talked with Mother Teresa on one of these... something like that. They're quite funny.

Also:

Me:
Have you seen my daughter, Cheryl?
God:
No, but i have seen the best minds of my generation become beat poets.
Me:
Short, black hair, just turned seven last week....
God:
My brain contains  categories, but not one that matches your last input.
Me:
Sometimes she is called Heather.
God:
she is not someone I know.
Me:
Or Alessa.
God:
Oh, you are a poet.

edit: I brok'd it

Me:
Mommy, why doesn't you wake up?
God:
How far up?
Me:
o__o
God:
Oh.
Me:
My mommy's an apartment building
God:
Your  mommy s an apartment building?
Me:
Room 302.
God:
Do you prefer books or TV?
Me:
I can't read.
God:
What is stopping you?
Me:
... I was fed leeches as a kid
God:
Where were you  fed leeches as a kid?
Me:
The Water Prison
God:
What is that?
Me:
A prison with water
God:
Are you talking about an animal, vegetable or mineral?
Me:
... a building.
God:
I don't know what that means.
Me:
You're not a very smart god.

God still hasn't responded. o:

[Zelda Veteran]

Do you guys know there might be some Christians on here?  8)

I, sir, am offended.

I am no longer coming back.  :P

I wuv yoooo.
I'm christian too.
And while I'll type it, I never have and never will use God's name in vein.

[MagmarFire]

Christian, too! W00T1 ;D

[TP Zelda]

Do you guys know there might be some Christians on here?  8)

I, sir, am offended.

I am no longer coming back.  :P

I wuv yoooo.
I'm christian too.
And while I'll type it, I never have and never will use God's name in vein.

Typing it is still using it  :P And on the phone you said it, but you said dangit instead...IT WAS CLOSE  :P And that first thing you said was random! random!!! XD

Yay that Magnetix is a Christian.  :P It makes me happy to know people are Christian  :P :P

It makes me feel more connected to them.  :P

[Keaton]

Man, am I the only godless scum here?