Bogus news stories.

[DW]

Alright, so, I have an audition in a few hours. I want to audition as two newscasters reeling off obviously bogus stories. What I have so far:

"Police busted up a nudist's rights riot in San Francisco today. Observed one officer, 'No nudes is good news.'"

"Someone broke into the police headquarters and stole all the toilets. So far the cops have nothing to go on."

"At a celebrity paintball match last weekend, Russel Crowe reportedly ordered his team to fire at will. Will Smith is in critical condition."

"PETA launched a new campaign to change the name of fish to 'Sea Kittens', under the idea that nobody wants to hurt a sea kitten. While this is true, I now have an appetite for Land Fish, formerly known as cats."

Any ideas?

[Gamefreak]

They're all pretty good.

Might want to be careful on the last one though.  You never know who's in charge of casting.

[DW]

Oh, she loves cats. But hell, she thought it was funny when I had to impersonate her before.

We're not an easily offended bunch.

[Keaton]

"This just in:  Toilet seat thief was caught standing on the tank of another station's toilets.  Police believe the suspect to have been high on pot."

[DW]

I love you Tacheon.

I'm thinking about having the skit end with them getting a fire report and one of the anchors realizing it's his house and running off.

[Hi no Seijin]

"At a celebrity paintball match last weekend, Russel Crowe reportedly ordered his team to fire at will. Will Smith is in critical condition."

lulz

"PETA launched a new campaign to change the name of fish to 'Sea Kittens', under the idea that nobody wants to hurt a sea kitten. While this is true, I now have an appetite for Land Fish, formerly known as cats."

Does Adult Swim know you're stealing their bumps?  Or do you secretly work for them?

[DW]

Wait, Adult Swim had that?

...

Crap.

Anyways, I forgot the Will Smith one and skipped over it in the auditions.

[Hi no Seijin]

They had something similar to that.

Speaking of Adult Swim, I think Tacheon secretly works for Adult Swim.

[The Glamour Nazi]

Are you kidding? He's an MI-6 spy.

He's hotter than James bond.

[Hi no Seijin]

Anywho, how did your auditions go, Shika?  I guess you wouldn't know yet, but did you think you performed well?

[Keaton]

They had something similar to that.

Speaking of Adult Swim, I think Tacheon secretly works for Adult Swim.

And why do you say that?

[Hi no Seijin]

Just the way they say stuff sometimes reminds me of you.  I would not be surprised if you work for Adult Swim.

[Keaton]

Oh, oh I see.  By that logic, it only makes sense that Commodore works for Adult Swim, too.

And thanks, I guess.

[DJ]

[Hi no Seijin]

Well, yeah, him too, but he hasn't been on for a while now, so I didn't think I would need to mention him.  You know, since he might not see it.

[DW]

[DJ]

I FOUND WALDO

Anywho, how did your auditions go, Shika?  I guess you wouldn't know yet, but did you think you performed well?

Meh, aside from forgetting the Will story, it went well. people were dying of laughter. I got cast in a fairly large role.