Deep

[Fishalicious]

Okay, so like, I was going to do this last week, but I felt like I lost all confidence after working for a few hours.

Then I got my confidence back, I suppose. (however, if it takes another 30 minutes to write two more lines, I may snap the CPU over my knee before I finish this post)

It's been causing me to chew wounds into my lip and on the side of my mouth. It's been haunting me for a while. I don't know why, no one's really brought it up.

So, when I was a child... I was molested/sexually abused. I never really understood what was going on, and I was afraid, so it continued for a while. I was miserable, and many times I was tempted to just put my face in a pillow and never breathe again... or to shove my face in the sink.

I finally had enough courage to say "no." I asked her to stop. I was shoved off a building. It has caused permanent damage to me; my jaw doesn't close completely, and I have a very minor limp in my ankles. I was very close to death; there was a cement goat head near my own head, and if I'd hit it, I wouldn't be here today. I lost conscienceness, and I remember coming to with blood pouring out of my mouth.

I just... I'm not fond of people. It's not the last time something like this has happened. It's a big reason why I don't hang out with someone who I would've considered my "best friend" a while ago... u_u; that and the physical abuse.

Thank you for listening. Any questions?

[TP Zelda]

I'm VERY sorry that happened. (Kinda sounds like something out of an anime, the building part) But I'm glad you shared this with us. I guess sometimes it helps to get these kind of things off your chest!!


I'm sorry I don't have very wise words. XP And sorry if I offended you somehow... ^^;;

[Fishalicious]

No, I don't think you can offend me on the subject. Not unless you say something completely and utterly arrogant (like, "serves you right, you little -insert favourite profanity here-") like a few people have... one being my second "best friend." u_u;

And yeah, the building part is weird... I saw the anime Sukisyo, and the same thing happened to the main character. (The building part, that is.) It wasn't that high, so I didn't suffer as much damage as I could've, but I broke the plywood under me.

[Aureliano]

Wow.  I never knew.  Have you gone to any therapy?  Not that you need it, of course.....................

Well, I am also glad you have shared your feelings with us.  

[Fishalicious]

Lots of people never knew. I don't know why; up until a few weeks ago, I was absolutely terrified of what would happen if someone, god forbid, knew.

Then I woke up on Tuesday some day, and I just felt... okay with it. I'm not going to try to forget it; what happens to us makes us who we are. I just decided I'm going to accept it.

And I don't think I need therapy... I suppose I consider myself to be perfectly sane. Though I'm... not, I guess. I twitch in my sleep and am a general insomniac. I wake easily and dream horribly.

[TP Zelda]

Lol yeah well,TW did a dance and changed the blankets around in his sleep.  :P

[Commodore Axilon]

And I don't think I need therapy... I suppose I consider myself to be perfectly sane. Though I'm... not, I guess. I twitch in my sleep and am a general insomniac. I wake easily and dream horribly.

Well, that doesn't sound good. I don't mean to sound crass or anything, but if there's something wrong then you need to get help. Not that I'm saying that there necessarily is, but the human psyche is a complex thing. It's all interconnected up there.

Also, I'm glad you decided to tell us, Fisk. I suppose it's best to get these type of things off your chest.

[Mysterious F.]

I agree, perhaps some medical therapy would be nice for you, Fisk.

And I, too, am glad you told this to us. Not so that we could know, but now it shows you have completely gotten over the past. Way to go.  :)

[darkphantomime]

Psychiatric therapy.

And how old was this other girl? It doesn't make sense, I mean, if she were the same age as you, she'd be very, very sick.

If I were you I'd explain thos to everyone that you know who hangs around that girl, maybe they'll all come to an understanding and leave her for good.

[Fishalicious]

She was a couple of years older.

Oh, I would, but the other girl? She's labeled me a liar, and none of her friends believe me. Of course, the people who follow her are now complete jerks, so I don't really care that much. Not that I want that to happen to them, I don't think anyone needs to go through that... I think it's because Other Girl liked me and I... didn't. u_u; so I suppose they're safe.

As for therapy, maybe later. My parents.... don't know. u_u; well, they do, but I'm not sure if they understand exactly. I mentioned it and sort of ran off.

[Mysterious F.]

From what I have learned from what you say, Fisk, you don't have the world's most understanding parents, so it'd be best if you told them directly about medical therapy.

[MagmarFire]

None of you may have been able to see it, but my mouth was literally open after reading that. Man, oh, man, oh, man.... Fisk, I am sorry... Truth be told, at first, I could hardly believe what I was reading! It was like coming to a turning point in a story! Except this is real... You were actually (in technical terms) at gravity's mercy!?

Fisk, you need a hug! *hugs Fisk*

Now, where is that girl who...wait, was it she who shoved you off the building? If it was, and I find her... *fetches Keyblade replica* OHHHHOHOHOHOHO, IT'S ON!!!! >:

. . . Okay, I probably wouldn't use violence like that, but you didn't deserve taking permanent damage. :'(

Hold on, what were you doing on a building, anyway? (Pardon the stupid question. ;) )

[Kairi]

At first I didn't beleive you but,wow.then I got a wired mental in my head.It was Hannah Montana pushing a fish off the Empire  
State Building.

[Gamefreak]

I think....that everything happens for a reason.  If you were lucky enough to miss that which would kill you, then obviously, there's something important for you to do with your life.

[TP Zelda]

Yeah, it just... wasn't your time to go yet.