Ask Ezlo questions

[Keaton]

Dear Ezlo, what is the point of this?

Why does it hurt when I urinate?

[JDog]

Dear ezlo, does your face hurt? Because its killin me, XD

[Gamefreak]

Dear Ezlo,

Why?

[MagmarFire]

dere eazloh,

i herd u liek mudkipz! iz dis tru!?/!11?// lol

[DW]

Dear Ezlo,

Whose hand is it that's stuck in the toilet in the Stock Pot Inn?

[Vaati]

Maybe we should just give this a rest for now, Ezlo already has too many questions to answer. (P.S. If you know who does Ask Ezlo, PM them and tell them to get on and answer these questions)

[Rev Rabies]

dear ezlo, why havent you answered any of our questions yet? I DEMAND SATISFACTION! *slaps ezlo with glove*

[DW]

Dear Ezlo, is your absence due to your overdosing on Picorialis Natural Minish Enhancement again?

[darkphantomime]

Dear Ezlo,
           Why do Electrons taste so much like Grape-ade?

[Pale Dim]

Dear Ezlo, who's on my account?

[Ask Ezlo]

ACK! What's happened to me? I SWEAR I must learn to stay away from those strange smelling mushrooms!

Where's that darn secretary of mine? She's to blame for this mess!

:has someone whisper in ear:

What do you mean I already did this joke?!  

"Dear Ezlo, Who's better, Kirk or Picard?"

Everyone knows the answer to this one! It's that handsome fellow over there, the one with the oversized chest and flamboyant deamonor. Ezlo loves the man of men, that bald-headed scoundrel, Kirkard!

"Dear ezlo, are you smarter than a 5th grader? I hope so, cause if your not thats pretty bad. "

I assure you, that the mighty Ezlo is smarter than anyone who manages to survive the modern public school system... Now if only I could figure out what 2+2 equaled... hmm... is it Five?

"Dear Ezlo, If Jimmy cracked corn and I don't care, why am I singing about it?"

Because when you attach magnets to robots, everybody cracks corn in crackling commas of constipated contraptions!

"Dear Ezlo, do you have one of these lives people speak of?
Or a boot to the head?"

I have a life to the head and a boot that people speak of. Of course, the life is filled with stinky mildew and the boot is boring with its drunk festerings of...

[size=15]MUSHROOMS![/size]

Oh wait, or was it the other way around?


"Dear Ezlo, What's your favorite Zelda game?"

Wouldn't this be obvious? that's right boys and girls! The almighty Ezlo is fan of the great "Zelda - The masked-minish-oracle-waker-of-time's-awakening"

"Dear Ezlo, Why does Orange Juice make my eyes and hair burn to the point of combustion?"

This is very simple... start using my patented Grape-aid and you will not go wrong! Grapes are opposites to Oranges, aren't they?

:has someone whisper in ear:

Curses to you, editor! What do you mean the common phrase is 'apples and oranges'? HUMBUG! lousy editor, always trying to....

"Dear Ezlo,
Have you ever eaten Fried Minish?...Okay, I'll get right to the point: Daphne says your a cannibal.

P.S. What does Daphne look like?"

My darned-secretary-whom-I-can't-remember-the-name-of' is a terrible liar. Now if only I could have some fried green minish stew...

PS: Like fried minish stew... OH WAIT!

"Dear Ezlo, what is the worst question that has been sent to you so far?"

This one

"Dear Ezlo, I meant besides that question. "

Then it's this one.

"Dear Ezlo, why isn't Whocares required to only have one sentence letters? "

Please see question and answer above.

"Dear Ezlo, what is the point of this?

Why does it hurt when I urinate?"

Good question! Now if only my secretary were here to answer it...

PS: Because your mother was a hamster, your father smelt of elderberries and you need to learn to stay away from my hot minish daughter.

"dere eazloh,

i herd u liek mudkipz! iz dis tru!?/!11?// lol "

Now if only I knew what you just said...

:goes to urbandictionary.com:

:returns:

OH DEAR GOD! YOU PERVERT! STAY AWAY FROM...

:Has someone whisper in ear:

Oops... I thought 'mudkipz' was a term for an animalistic fetish

:has someone whisper in ear:

WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT IT IS?!

"Dear Ezlo,

"Whose hand is it that's stuck in the toilet in the Stock Pot Inn?"

Believe me, if I were brave enough to go down there and find out, I wouldn't be answering this question. (I love self-explanatory paradoxes!)

"dear ezlo, why havent you answered any of our questions yet? I DEMAND SATISFACTION! *slaps ezlo with glove* "

please see questions and answers above.

"Dear Ezlo, Why do Electrons taste so much like Grape-ade?"

Because nothing can beat Mushrooms! AND LOTS OF THEM!! I MUST HAVE... MORE!!!

Now children, I hope this satisfied my obligation. BUT NOTHING CAN STOP THE MIGHTY EZLO!

......

(except for maybe that oversized elephant-owlbear in my lap! oh wait... AHHHH!!!)

[Rev Rabies]

and why arent my questions getting answered? I STILL DEMAND SATISFACTION! *slaps ezlo again with leather glove*

[Mysterious F.]

Dear Ezlo, you are being arrested for crimes against humanity, and the UN will decide your sentence. If it is a death sentence, you will be executed by a giant falling blade (a.k.a. a razor blade) that will cut you in half. What do you have to say for yourself?

[Gamefreak]

Dear Ezlo, you are being arrested for crimes against humanity, and the UN will decide your sentence. If it is a death sentence, you will be executioned by a giant falling blade that will cut you in half. What do you have to say for yourself?

You could probably just use a razor blade.  He's only a couple inches tall.

[DW]

No kidding, you'd probably miss with a guillotine.