Greetings, greetings! I am Ezlo, the world renowned Minish Keeper of Lore. I know everything and anything about Hyrule, from the total annual rainfall in the Parapa Desert (zero!) to the average height of the Gerudo Male (6'2"). I have made my vast resevoir of knowledge of the ways and facts of Hyrule available to the readers of the Desert Colossus, and thusly if you have any questions for the Great and Wise Ezlo, then ask away using the form below! You can also email ask_ezlo_of_tdc [at] yahoo [dot] com with the subject line "Ask Ezlo Submission."

Anonymous Asks
Dear Ezlo, Are you back just because KamikazePlumber got a hold of those pictures? Or is there an ulterior motive? Oh, and which disease would you say is worse, Teenagarius Typicus, or Lackofinformatae Smartassus?

Ezlo Replies…
Curses! That Evil Slave Driver handsome executive chairman is an evil wonderful kind man. That is why I’m taking revenge forcing our beloved webmaster into my sweat shop.

PS – Lackofinformatae Smartassus wait… ANONYMOUS? LEGION? LINOGE?! NOOOOOOO!

Magmarfire Asks
Dear Ezlo, Did you ever use money as an excuse to screw the rules?

Ezlo Replies…
Daphne, put this in the annoying internet meme file.

Shiitake Mushroom Asks
Dear Ezlo, How & when did Ganondorf’s skin turn green?

Ezlo Replies…
And that children, is why it is important to stay away from my Hot Minish Daughter.

ILOVELINK Asks
Dear Ezlo, In some Zelda games Link holds his sword in tis rieght hand and in some he holds it in his left hand. Why is this????????????????

Ezlo Replies…
In the old days, each byte was extremely precious, so they’d usually mirror sprites rather than create more sprites in order to conserve space. Either that or they’d just randomly flip the entire world over so that everything went in the opposite direction – including Link’s hand preference.

Gasphin Asks
Dear Ezlo, If thee Twili Are a Race With Lot's'o'Magic And BlahBlahBlah...Does that mean they could have created Majoras Mask?

Ezlo Replies…
Interesting theory! The main thing is to try to pay attention to the various symbols around the Twilight Realm. The connections go a fair bit deeper than first impressions give.

Nerdfrombeyond Asks
Dear Ezlo, Do you think there will be a second Zelda for the Wii? If so, do you know what it will be like?

Ezlo Replies…
Of course! We can now bask in the glory of a wonderful gift from the Gods! That’s right Children, our next Wii Zelda will feature... :Daphne hands Ezlo a note: :mutters to self: Oh, sorry children, I am not at liberty to speak of the holy of holies. But for now, Nintendo would like you to bask in the glory of the Wii version of… TINGLE’S GRAND THEFT RUPEE! Featuring endless excitement… Living off of Hard Rupees and paying off the cops to protect your monopoly!

Peka Asks
Dear Ezlo, is it unhealthy in any way to have made a plushie of Vaati? Just wondering...

Ezlo Replies…
Of course not, meanwhile, let’s have some fun and use him as a pincushion. That’ll teach that spoiled apprentice!

Bob Asks
Dear Ezlo, YELLOW!

Ezlo Replies…
BLUE! No, GREEN! AHHHH!!! :is cast into the minish pocket dimension of DOOM!:

The west thing Asks
Dear Ezlo, Where do Carrots come from?

Ezlo Replies…
They come from the land of shiny orange Unicorns! :collapses:

Ezlo Fan!!!! Asks
Dear Ezlo, Good to have you back Ezlo. Anyway, where were we when we last left off? Oh yeah, you're old and short and you probably smell like old people. How do you feel about that?

Ezlo Replies…
Wonderful news everyone! I am about to be indicted for breaking and entering, kidnapping and extortion! Wait, that’s not wonderful news at all!

Name:

Your Question:
Dear Ezlo,